Patrick McGuiness rhymes with fatass

Patrick McGuiness, this years Republican sacrificial lamb in HD 50, has a new ad tying Mark Strama to President Obama. What’s funny about that is

1) Despite lower numbers than 2008, President Obama still enjoys a lot of support in Austin and the minor loss in support is related mostly to Obama’s failure on key policy areas that Patrick McGuiness wouldn’t support in a million years. Strama won’t have any problems with those voters who LOVE him.

2) The electorate in HD50 is quite a bit smarter than your average yokel out in the drive through counties of Texas. They know the difference between ‘STATE’ and ‘FEDERAL’. Now, what would be nice is if Patrick McGuiness could understand that as well. In the end, all this does is make Patrick look like he doesn’t understand the diff between the Lege and Congress.

3) Though it may be superficial as hell, Strama is more attractive that Patrick who looks like he’s eaten a sack of potatoes.

Patrick is also, obviously, of Irish derivation. He’s kinda pudgy, which means his primary source of nutrition MUST be potatoes, which I happen to hate. He probably also likes to drink, since all Irish do… just look at HIS NAME. He probably enjoys a warm pint of that nasty, semi-fluid toxic waste. And I hate that crap, too.

Connect.The.Dots.People! I can’t be the only one that sees this! Patrick McGuinness just might be a proxy for the Irish government which seeks a foothold in Texas from which they can spread pastoral landscapes, bad food, terrible whiskey and financial ruin via collapsing banks.

WE HAVE TO STOP THE IRISH MENACE. Just look at his campaign ads that feature a picture of his kid… what you don’t understand is that for every child they show you, there are 5 more out of sight. The Irish are as prolific when it comes to babies as Dick Wolfe is with the creation of crime dramas!

Finally, have you SEEN what these people eat for breakfast?!?! It’s a plate of leftovers and eggs, what we would call garbage!

I fear for our way of life if HD50 becomes an Irish Freehold. It’s essential that Mark Strama win. The stakes couldn’t be higher. If you love your country, you’ll vote for Mark Strama.

I should know about all this… I’m an eighth Irish and every day it’s a battle to keep that paddy in the back of my head beaten down. But I have to do it, lest he declare independence and claim a piece of my brain as his ‘Republic’.

On a serious, personal note to McGuiness : You and your consultants are fucktards. You don’t run against Mark Strama in THAT district with President Obama. You’re just wasting money and running an even stupider campaign than the last dipshit R who ran against Strama.

Not that you’d win even with a good strategy, it’s just that at least then I wouldn’t be so offended by your sloppy, pathetic effort.

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