Wendy Davis… THE DISASTER!

It’s obvious that Wendy Davis will not become our next Governor. Honestly, as Dave Mann at the Texas Observer points out, the Davis campaign’s handling of the press is appallingly bad. Clearly, though it’s only a few hours into February 1st, she stands no chance in November. Now comes the rending of garments and donning of sackcloth and ashes to be followed, in short order, by emotional eating and cutting. I’ll be eating Krispy Kreme Original Glazed and using a Schick Silk Effects (my skin is sensitive).

Now, for those of you with the press (most of whom have already read some of my opinions on this subject), you need to understand that the JBR Dinner in Austin was a TCDP event. I don’t think we’ve ever had press there but maybe someone came for a free meal and drinks comped by a campaign since, as everyone knows, Democrats looooooove the press and still take you guys seriously. Republicans are openly contemptuous of you and the Teabaggers regard subprime mortgage brokers as more trustworthy than you. Democrats are still too chicken shit to know you don’t matter. DON’T overplay your hand by talking about how Dave Mann and someone from PJ Media took your side. Observer readers are going to vote for Davis regardless of what he writes and the douche from PJ is just egging you on hoping it’ll inflict some damage on Senator Davis. It won’t, but they’ll keep trying. Ask yourself why a Republican is soooooo concerned all of the sudden with press access (it ain’t because they desire a well informed electorate).

To the Davis Campaign, stop thinking about how you’re going to decorate your office in the fucking Capital and get your fucking head in the fucking game. And just so we’re clear on this, I’ve done all your jobs… I’ve helped run two statewide general election campaigns with three other friends (one on the first, two on the second) and we had less money to spend than you guys will blow on hotel rooms. You have to realize you’re all fuckups right now. You keep tripping over each other and working at cross purposes. Stop it. Get your shit together, pick a leader, assign responsibilities and do your jobs. Don’t try to be something you’re not, just work on your assignment and trust your co-workers to work on theirs. Don’t take any of this too seriously… you are just campaign staff and Senator Davis is still just a candidate and a State Senator at a time when most people respect homeless addicts more than elected officials. I don’t care if your last job was in some State Senate office or, God forbid, a State Representatives. Right now you’re just campaign staff on a Democratic campaign in Texas, about as far from an episode of the West Wing as it’s possible to get. I love you, I respect you and I know the pain you’re going to suffer (and what you’ve experienced thus far is nothing compared to what October is going to feel like). But you need to unass your collective heads and start working as a team.

Finally, to my fellow Democrats who are worried about all this… Davis’s people are doing their best, but they’re stupid right now. One thing I’ve learned is that you get smart fast on a campaign so quit your kvetching and whining. Frankly, you need to take action… raise money, register voters, block walk and phone bank. Don’t bother the staff with ideas about some policy bullshit you think is important because it’s not. The staffer you’re talking to wakes up every morning in a different hell. The sleep you get in a night, they’re getting over three to four days. They haven’t had a decent meal in a week or more and, if they have kids, they’ve forgotten the name of at least one of them. A little compassion and a ‘you’re doing a great job’ goes a long way… so does volunteering to do something other than serve on the policy advisory committee or put a sign in your yard.

Special note to the Davis staff: You’re going to do great but you needed a kick in the ass. I’ll give you some advice… give up the beer and switch to liquor (beer takes too long), do not make the mistake of thinking the rest of Texas is like Austin or even Dallas or Houston (it ain’t), be unfailingly polite and refer to every person you meet as sir or ma’am, and feel free to send me an email if you want to bitch or just ask where to eat in Tulia (El Camino). If you think you’re fucking up, you probably are…but we all have. Ask me sometime about the candidate I went to ABIA to pickup, rather than Atlantic FBO where he actually was.

And to my friends in the press, no one wants you to be relevant again more than me. So quit acting like reporters and start being journalists. If you’re irritated by what I’ve written, understand it’s YOUR fault it’s reality, not mine. So go fucking change it… quit writing about campaign and pundit bullshit and start informing the fucking electorate about something other than timeline issues on a bio that’s true.

This entry was posted in Media Madness, Stupid Democratic Tricks. Bookmark the permalink.

Comments are closed.