Another way to make fun of Deepak Chopra

From The Mayor (who really does need to post more) comes this wonderful site.

Posted in yes, it made me laugh | Comments Off

Gringos & Other Assholes: Recollections From The 2014 TDP Convention

Yours truly was able to escape from the Home for Retired Fast Food Mascots just long enough over the past few days to attend the Texas Democratic Party’s 2014 Convention in Dallas. I continue to thank god that it was not held in Corpus Christi, because they would have had to carry my ass out of that overly-humid town in an ambulance to the nearest location with less than 98% humidity and skanky seawater.

I brought Birdie back a Wendy Davis sign, and she and The King are already snorting lines off of it–and it isn’t even 10 a.m. My work here is done!

Seriously, though, not a bad convention. On the bright side, the drinking at this convention was finally significant enough to put me on a list for a liver transplant (THANK YOU, HAPPY HOURS!). On the downside, who the hell were all the 20-somethings at this convention? For a minute, I thought that a chapter of Delta Tau Delta had taken over operations of the convention floor–then I realized all those kids were actually sober. There were so many damned volunteers and young people (TDP Fellows, I think they call them now), that all old-timers like Bill Brannon had to do was stand at the door of the Rural Caucus room and re-direct people to other locations–and Harold Cook must have left early because I didn’t see him anywhere. With all those kids running around in suits, the old-hands didn’t seem to have much to do (which is good, because those guys have been carrying this thing on their back for the last two decades, and they deserve a break).

Aside from running with an efficiency not seen during the reign of the Graham Cracker as Party Chair, and those fucking mustache posters (seriously–the biggest joke teetering under the surface of the convention had to do with mustache rides), it was a pretty normal convention.

So far, the only thing I’ve found that the right-wing has been too much up-in-arms over is Trey Martinez Fischer’s comment about GOP standing for, “Gringos y otros Pendejos.” See this. Sadly, though, that one is too funny even for most Republicans to get their panties in too much of a twist. And, since Michael L. Williams is the only African American I’m aware of in the Republican Party of Texas, it has the added virtue of being at least true enough to laugh at. Plus, I think Trey Martinez Fischer is at least half gringo (Fischer, anyone?), so that must surely temper the Republican outrage.

So, now that the niceties (i.e., saying just enough about the convention to prove I was at least sober enough to be at parts of it) are out of the way, it’s time for a list of shit. Because it is Monday, my liver hurts, and I am still traumatized by the site of Leticia Van De Putte’s hands laying waste to a plate of chicken. So deal with it.

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Posted in Those TDP Gooberheads | Comments Off

Well f*ck you too, Ken

Ken Herman has a nice little rant about the anniversary of the Davis filibuster in the Statesman. It’s honestly not a bad piece and I find myself agreeing with him or, rather, I would agree with him if his recollection matched reality. There are two niggling points…

1) The ‘screamers’ didn’t start screaming until Dewhurst acted to cut off Sen. Davis based on nothing. When the majority in the Senate can’t be bothered to do what’s right, those from the outside, peacefully, SHOULD do their part. The fact that Herman doesn’t see it that way is disturbing and frankly surprising given that he’s not a stupid guy. Where is Herman’s indignation at the fact that NOT A SINGLE REPUBLICAN stood with the Democrats to stop Lt. Governor Dewhurst from moving to cut off Senator Davis?

2) There’s a larger point here that the press better get around soon… the idea that they need to upbraid Democrats for not acting weakly and then NEVER TAKE REPUBLICANS TO TASK ON ANYTHING. That’s why the title of this piece reads the way it does… I refuse to take ANY criticism from a Pulitzer winner who doesn’t bother to even mention the anti-Democratic actions of the Senate Majority trying to silence the Minority.

Of course, none of this even matters… less than 20k people will bother to read Herman’s piece, fewer still will care. Poorly written commentary like this is why print media continues it’s long, slow death.

Posted in Media Madness | Comments Off

The end of Chris Christie?

At Heart of Christie Inquiry, a Law Feared on Wall Street –

This could be the thing that finally takes down the bloviating asshole.

Posted in Stupid Republican Tricks | Comments Off

Cheney called out on FOX

THIS is good… it’s long overdue, but I have to admit it’s wonderful to see.

Posted in Stupid Republican Tricks | Comments Off

No, no… you don’t get to play the victim!


Yep, you had to see this coming

Savvy conservatives and evangelicals are acknowledging, often privately, that public opinion is not in their favor. And they fear what will happen in the future to those who fought against the rising tide of public opinion.

“We have people who are losing their jobs, being smeared publicly because they hold the view that marriage is a union between one man and one woman,” said Tony Perkins, president of the Family Research Council, an evangelical think tank and lobbying organization. “They are called bigots. Homophobes. That is not the way we operate in a free society.”

Let’s start right at the top… for a lot of people, opposition to same sex marriage is akin to being opposed to racial equality. Even the dumbest person would have to understand why someone wouldn’t want to be associated with a known racist so how would anyone think this is different? No one is saying you can’t hold whatever opinion you want, but don’t be surprised if people decide they don’t want you around.

“No, I’ll go further than that,” Perkins continued. “This New McCarthyism demands, ‘Do you now think or have you ever thought that marriage should remain the union of a man and a woman?’ Answer incorrectly, and watch your career be taken from you and your reputation smeared on a thousand websites.”

Seriously, this level of butthurt is just unbelievable. Perkins has made a living by demonizing lesbian and gay Americans and now he’s terrified that someone is going to remember that? It’s called karma, bitch… man up and take it. Speaking of fundraising, here’s someone from the National Organization for Marriage which was a prolific fundraiser that stoked the fires of hatred daily for decades…

“Even supporters of abortion don’t go around saying that people who believe that life begins at conception are evil people,” said Brian Brown, president of the National Organization of (sic) Marriage. “But this is not the case here, and the problem is that the establishment gay marriage groups have not condemned this view that those of us who favor traditional marriage are bigots and therefore should be abolished.”

You spend decades fighting us, calling us names, being nasty and accusing of us everything from destroying America to being the next Nazis and NOW you want US to give you a free pass? A simple statement of ‘Don’t sweat it, bro. It’s all good’? Sure thing, man… right after I pull the hundred thousand knives out of my back. Brown, much like Perkins, just couldn’t help going a little further.

Another difference between earlier American civil rights conflicts and this one, he said, was that slavery, or discriminating against someone on the basis of race, was considered immoral around the world for centuries while the practice was ongoing in parts of the U.S. Hardly anyone in politics, on the other hand, was pushing for gay marriage “until about 10 years ago, but the people who don’t totally want to redefine a definition of marriage that has lasted for thousands of years need to be shunned.”

Yes, and much like the fight against gay marriage, the Bible was used a shield for those who opposed interracial marriage and the abolition of slavery. Brown’s truly a master at infuriatingly glib dissembling.

Yet (Ryan T.) Anderson (of the Heritage Foundation, natch) himself was involved in an incident that anti-gay marriage activists point to as an example of the increasing threat they are under. After he was booked to speak at Stanford earlier this year, an uproar ensued and gay student groups demanded that the organization that invited Anderson be stripped of its funding to put on the event.

Anderson said he had spoken at the university without incident the previous year, and he attributed the change in tone to Justice Anthony Kennedy’s ruling in the Supreme Court’s gay marriage case, in which he wrote that the purpose of bans was to “disparage and injure” gay couples.

“He was essentially saying that opposing viewpoints don’t have a right to be heard,” Anderson said.

No, he was saying that laws against allowing LGBT Americans to marry were designed to hurt them. The ruling didn’t ban you from spewing your ignorance or hatred, it just eliminated your hatred and prejudice as a reason to enact a law that specifically targeted a group of Americans.

As a recently engaged gay American who can not, at present, marry in my home state, the ignorance and hatred these people engendered and made money from are and will be a part of my life for a long time. For those folks at the Heritage Foundation, FRC and NOM I can say only this… don’t expect me to go out of my way to forget that you made my life, and lives of tens of millions of others, far more difficult. We may forgive, but we will not forget.

Posted in Calling Bullshit, yes, it made me laugh | Comments Off

Let me introduce you to Schmucky McSchmuckerson

Jeff Davis, President of the Austin chapter of Log Cabin Republicans, is a schmuck. While we admit he seems like an earnest and hard working guy, he’s still a schmuck and so are his fellow Log Cabin members. Yes, while the rest of us are living our lives, these schmucks are trying to reshape a party that is effectively defined as old, white, fat, and stupid by asking them to reconsider their ignorant opinions on homosexuality.

Oh, yeah… if you’re Republican you’re probably also wrong on economic and tax policy. But neither make you a schmuck, they just make you kind of goofy like Mitt Romney who can’t even calculate an effective tax rate without making the very stupid mistake of adding together the rates of all the different kinds of taxes paid by a self employed business owner. What makes you a schmuck is trying to change a party that is run by activists who think homos are barely human.

Posted in Austin, Stupid Republican Tricks, Texas | Comments Off

And the hits just keep on coming

  • In a followup to our piece on property taxes, we found this proposal from Senator Watson which is just complete crap.

    Here’s a simple rule for everyone in Texas: If a politician tells you they have a solution to high property taxes and it doesn’t involve an income tax, you need to STOP LISTENING. Anything else is analogous to rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic.

  • The DMN has a great piece on the overreliance in Texas on toll roads. The funny thing is that the money quote comes not from a Democrat, but from a Republican…Ladies and Gentleman, I give you Senator John Carona:

    Carona, the state senator, said the reliance on tolls actually costs North Texans more than raising the gas tax would have. He said that toll projects cost more than three times what free roads do because they involve much more complicated financing methods and typically involve private developers who aim to make a profit.
    Carona said politicians who pat themselves on the back for not raising the gas tax have effectively hit their constituents’ pocketbooks harder.
    “It’s been a hoax on the public,” he said.

    Thank you, Senator Carona, for finally saying in plain English what we’ve known to be true since 2006.

  • Posted in Stupid Democratic Tricks, Stupid Republican Tricks, Texas, Transportation | Comments Off

    No, you can’t. You just CAN’T.

    You’ve all heard of In The Pink. It, like this blog, started before Tumblr was the cool place to blog, and before bored bloggers could use Tinder to find a writing partner (Note: I think this is what you use Tinder for, but I’m so out of touch with technology, I may be wrong).

    Well, today, Eileen Smith, the Pink Lady, the blogger in residence, the head enchilada, she who once worked with Burka and stalked Mark Warner (who?), has decided to call it quits.

    This could not have come at a worse time for the world.

    I mean, I know drinking Pinot and raising a baby and a pug are really hard while you are also single-handedly running this country’s campaign to increase Starbucks’ barista literacy, but now?

    Who is going to reveal to us that Dan Patrick’s medical records show he has small testicles? And who, mind you, WHO, is going to be around to sort it all out the next time a politician gets sued for making his nanny power wash his house (and you KNOW this will happen again)? We are lost. Lost, I tell you. Lost.

    Worst of all, when Hillary runs in 2016, because god knows Texas won’t have a female governor this year (though we have high hopes for Lt. Gov.), who are we going to look to for the right level of snark, fear, abrasiveness, hatred, puzzlement, and confusion to possess when someone disses HillDog?

    Eileen, we know the pug and child need you, but you will be missed.

    I’m so sad right now. The only place I can go to drown my sorrows right now? Starbucks. And I’m telling them my name is EILEEN.

    Posted in Texas | Comments Off

    You’re still here? Steve Forbes edition

    Steve Forbes, as many of you know well, would probably be a failed vacuum salesman if not for his luck in the ovarian lottery. Coming out of the right vagina has given Forbes not only wealth but a platform to show the world that money may be able to buy you an incredible education but not the intelligence to understand.

    Case in point, his latest screed on the minimum wage. At issue, Seattle’s decision to increase the minimum wage to $15/hr. Forbes says…

    All of these consequences are well known, even if politicians and leftist economists pretend otherwise. So why did Seattle do it? Why have a number of other municipalities and states done the same, even if not on the same willfully destructive scale as Seattle?
    There’s more than wishful thinking and economic illiteracy operating here. Such moves reflect the frustrations and anger that erupt when an economy is stagnant and people lose faith in a prosperous future: If the marketplace won’t raise wages, then, by golly, we will decree them by law!

    Not for nothing, but ‘leftist economists’? Just in case you can’t hear the schmuck’s dog whistle, he’s talking about the folks who’ve been screaming for almost 40 years that supply side economics wouldn’t work. That tax cuts for the rich alone with exacerbate wealth and income inequality, increase the federal debt and depress long term economic growth below potential. The same folks who’ve been saying that speculative mania, not real fundamental growth, would be the result of supply side economic policies.

    You know, the people who were RIGHT. The people who got every single piece of this correct while people like Steve Forbes called them names like ‘leftist’.

    As for the last line, YES. There are a number of things the public sector can do to drive private sector employment and only the truly economically ignorant would think that government can never create jobs (think Boeing or Halliburton). One of the things government can do is mandate a minimum wage. In so doing, it raises the level of economic activity as those who are receiving the newer wage begin to consume more and aggregate wages increase a very marginal amount which holds back wage push inflation which I’m sure someone like Steve Forbes thinks is constantly a real problem. The one thing we know about people at the bottom of the economy is that they spend everything they make. THIS is where you want to put money to work, not dropping tax rates for Steve Forbes.

    Steve, unfortunately, isn’t done…

    One of the ugly—and utterly misunderstood—results of a weak currency is the erosion of social trust. As the link between honest effort and reward appears to be undermined, such values as hard work and saving for the future are mocked. Crony capitalism and financial speculation mushroom: Consume now, only suckers believe in the long term. Why invest, when the markets are rigged against you? Envy grows, and politicians profit by fanning divisions and targeting scapegoats.

    Aren’t we lucky that we have the scion of a wealth family, whose only achievement was arriving on earth between the right pair of legs, to show us what we utterly misunderstand? This section is just completely crap. It’s not the weak dollar that’s causing the problem, it’s that people on the bottom do not have money to LIVE. This isn’t about luxuries, it’s about basic necessities. These people don’t have money for investment, they’re looking for ways to FEED themselves.

    It’s this piece that paints a crystal clear picture of why people like Steve Forbes can’t be part of the solution… they don’t even understand the problem. They are now so far removed from the day to day reality of ordinary Americans that they don’t even conceptually understand the issues faced by people earning the minimum wage. How can someone who thinks that the poor just don’t want to invest understand that the real issue faced by most people in the bottom 20% is how they are going to feed their families?

    Posted in Economy, Media Madness, Stupid Republican Tricks | 1 Comment